Catch Up

 Hello! January has been rough :/! Due to the relationship/fighting between my mom and step-dad, I decided it is time to move out. I have never lived on my own ... but enough is enough. I am hoping to leave in the spring. My mom has been supportive, I was really emotional having to tell her but she understands. All in all, it will be good for me. And for her! And hopefully she and my stepdad can continue to work on their relationship. Work has been work, I am really struggling there too - but I am surrounded by so much love. 

Yes, I am a VERY late bloomer when it comes to moving out but here we are. I am looking forward to my trip to Germany in March (with my family) and my cousin has agreed to go to Paris while we're over there - I just want to say, I went to Paris! The weather here has been the usual winter weather, cold, polar vortex, SNOW. All in all, the weather, the home situation and my emotions made it a pretty overwhelming month. The way the world is going too, just feels so down. I feel scared for my nieces/nephews, they are growing up in a world that is so different than the one I grew up in. Will they be ok? Sigh. Sending love to all, as usual!

Happy New Year

 I am not a good blogger! 2024 was a very tough year and brought about a lot of things I did not expect. While I hope for better this upcoming year, I am not really sure how it's all going to go. But I wish everyone out there a happy and blessed new year.

Blowing Off the Dust (Again!)

 It's been a while, ya'll. I am here, reading blogs! I just haven't posted. However, things have improved somewhat in my li!fe.

After all the anxiety built up, I called my family doctor. He listened to me, and referred me for some counseling. I have had a few sessions now - and they are extremely helpful. I really do feel better once I have chatted with her. Anxiety is a b!tch, I can tell you that much. 

My family drama seems to be cooled down - my sisters maintain a shaky truce BUT I think my youngest sister having a baby has hopefully helped things ease off. I did advise my older sister to seek therapy, but it takes time, you know? But she definitely needs it (hey, we all do!) Work rolls along, it has been stressful but I am trying to cope. It sucks at times though.

In other news -  I have the chance of possibly owning a place and having rental income? But I am so scared to do it, however my uncle really wants the place to stay in the family so I will be seeing if I am eligible for a mortgage :/ I cannot really afford to rent per se but if my uncle is ok with it, maybe I can pursue that option too, you know?

Tuesday 4 - Brands or Not?

 

Brands or Not??

 Welcome to another of Toni Taddeo's Tuesday 4 and this week we will use one from November of 2018...

1.   Food: ~ Do you buy brand names or go for the cheaper store name brand? - I have no issues with non brand names, depending on the food! I love Cheetos, but I can live with store brand style. Cheese - can do Kirkland from Costco instead of Balderson It really varies. Also, I prefer Mr Noodle to store brand instant noodles.

2.   Clothes: ~ Wear designer jeans/slacks with a brand name or regular department store jeans/slacks? I try now to buy it all on sale - the brands I buy are like the store brand - Dynamite, Garage for example - so not necessarily designer. 

3.   Handbags: ~ Buy a designer bag or look for a less expensive copy? I don't even like handbags anymore, LOL. But I go for a cheap brand whenever possible.

4.   Shoes: ~ You get the drift, designer or a cheaper copy? Brands all the WAY! But, have no issues getting them second hand, and prefer to buy them on sale :) but I definitely don't buy non brand unless I really like it or it is super cheap, lol!

Nassau Pics - pt 2

A beautiful palm tree - I loved seeing all the flowers and trees blowing in the breeze!

The water at the beaches I went to, had lots of the mossy stuff. So, I swam very little - it also was windy, and rocky so the swimming was not ideal for me!

The water still was pretty beautiful, even though not my cup of tea.

 I saw a few cats - I love cats, so this was great! I am not a huge picture gal, but this was pretty much my trip, LOL.

I Am Not A Great Blogger but here are some Vacation Pics! (pt 1)

 Funny how that works, eh? I do love to talk, but I am not great about committing to write here, lol! After my last post, my mom and step dad had already come back from their trip. It has been interesting, I don't know what they have decided between them. But, it seems a bit better. I am stressed with work, and life as per usual. I did go on vacation, and I have a couple more trips planned, with one to come in the summer I am hoping :)!!! 

So that is pretty much what I am looking forward to - a ton of travel :) here are some pictures of Nassau. Pricey, but a welcome retreat from the madness. I wish the beaches had been nicer, I would have done more swimming - as you can see, there was a lot of that mossy stuff - in the water, on the shore etc. That was my air BNB - simple and to the point.

This is the Queen's Staircase above - supposedly 66 steps, but there are actually less than that now, due to whatever reasoning.

This is their version of an Umbrella Alley - pretty, a little damaged because of some inclement weather but still pretty!!

Always a While/ A Rant / Vent

 Hello blog land. As usual, I disappeared. I hope everyone is well - I know some folks are traveling, taking time away from blogging etc. The year did not start off well for me. January just had a lot of ups and downs. Mostly downs. I live at home, and my mom and step dad had a huge fight right as they were to go away for a month to Trinidad, and she kicked him out of their room until the night before their trip, and she told him to set a date for separation if he did not sleep on the sofa as he had agreed to. It was very disheartening for me, since my parents are divorced and I lived through that here; so to hear them fight I was absolutely distraught. I spoke to them both, it was tough. My mom has her reasons, I don't blame her. He can be tough to deal with; but in all honesty so can my mom. They have returned from their trip and are OK?  I don't know. My friend says I need to take this as a sign that I need to learn to have tough discussions/ understand that sometimes difficult discussions need to be had, and that sometimes folks fight.

I have a lot of unresolved sadness around my parents divorcing, their marriage prior to that even. It's been made more difficult by the fact that my dad refuses to do anything if my mom is coming to the same event - making holidays and get togethers hard. This time last year, it felt like everyone was fighting over my sister's wedding. This year, it felt like my family was still fighting - and now this between my mom and step dad really took the wind out of my sails. As it is, my sister is having a baby and she and my dad had a huge falling out - he was not invited to her baby shower, she didn't even tell him she was having one and I am certain he found out at my other sister's birthday party. So all in all, not a great start to the year. 

I decided my year started with the Lunar New Year - I am hoping it is only UP from here. Thanks for listening/ reading. I hope everyone continues to feel loved and safe.